Brittany has a really trendy name from the 80’s. For the better part of her childhood and adolescence though, she wished her name was Samantha, as in American Girl Doll or Sam, as in Sam Micelli from Who’s the Boss. The universe kind of granted her that wish by hooking her up with mom bestie, Samm. Brittany works per diem as a nurse and stays home with her two kids, Vivienne and William. Vivi K. is 2 ½ years old and she’s sizing you up all the time. She likes shaking her hips to light 70’s rock, laughing/fake laughing uncontrollably and being under the impression that she’s running the show. Billy just turned 1 and loves you more today than yesterday, but not as much as tomorrow. He can be found wrestling and drool kissing his sister, saying dog, or in relentless pursuit of the TV remote with the big button that easily pops off and into his mouth. Brittany is fortunate to be married to Handsome Tom who navigates the choppy waters of his wife’s limbic system with ease, mostly. He drinks a lot of Manhattans. Brittany can often be found vacillating between pure joy and the depths of despair every fifteen minutes around the clock. No seriously, she knows she’s hashtag blessed and she’s very grateful. Here they are:
Samm added a second “m” to her name in sixth grade when she realized she was no longer the only Sam in her school. She has a law degree that she doesn’t use, an anxiety and shopping problem, and unhealthy obsessions with Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus, and the poop emoji. She has a pretty funny husband, Matt, and two little terrorists. Rex is a demonstrative, loveable, almost three year old who enjoys popcorn, trucks, and construction vehicles. Rocky is the tallest 10 month old on the block with a need for speed and an affinity for death defying tricks. She makes up for not having a daughter by dressing her dudes in skinny jeans from the girls’ section, and platinum leather moccasins. She works a couple of days a week doing admin stuff for her father’s weird construction company and co-owns a local Baby Boot Camp where she teaches fitness classes for moms. But most of her days are filled with dump trucks, nonorganic fruitsnacks, diapers, and the ipad mini. To remain sane she relies heavily on sarcasm, dance parties, bribery, and pushing the envelope. Here are her peeps:
So give it up people: you’re about to be mildly amused!