I love to color. I am one of those weird losers with an adult coloring book. My brother just bought me a new one actually...
(Yeah. He gets me.) Anyway, I find it soothing. I don't care. I actually love all crafts. Like I am oddly excited for Rex to come home with his first big project. Poster board totally excites me, especially that tri-fold kind where you get to make a real professional looking presentation. I sometimes drive to staples and grab some office supplies when I am feeling stressed. It actually helps. And, do they still do dioramas? (Whoa--that was spellchecked for sure. I almost wrote diarrhea. Which, I am now realizing, I also can not spell). Anyway--now that Rex is three, we can get our craft on. Okay, coloring time!
Well, I didn't really think of the most obvious issue--Rex has to want to color for me to be able to color with him. Currently, if it doesn't have wheels, he's not into it. Whatever. No problem. I'll get a truck coloring book. It will still be cool.
I have to bribe him with fruit snacks, but soon we are on our way. A big tow truck is ready for our artistic genius, and the beautiful crayola goodness is sitting in front of me. We are ready to go! "Let's do it together, Mommy! We can be a coloring team!"....oh, yes. How cute is that?! He wants to color with me! This is perfect!
Ummmm, that's a tire. Tires are black. No, no no no. Tires are not yellow. Fuck. And this is pale yellow. Like awful Easter Egg yellow. Okay, okay, it's fine. Tires can be yellow. This will be a cool, neon, colorful tow truck. No problem. Ohhhh, Jesus. Really, buddy? Are you sure that's the red you wanna use for the doors? I mean, I just feel like that red is kind of dark and serious and now that you did yellow wheels I kind of thought we were going for a brighter, more fun version of the tow truck. No, no, you are doing a great job. It looks great! It's perfect. Here is the silver for the bumper. What? You wanna use purple? Oh yeah, that's fine. I see a fucking ton of purple bumpers. Wait, shit, maybe you are color blind? Rex, are you blind? ARE YOU?!?!
Well, I think I'll stay away from the dioramas.